The Perfect Profile

The Perfect Profile?

Sorry kids, there’s no such thing.

We’re not even going to try to teach you how to write a profile that will attract every reader. Even if it were possible (which it isn’t), you’d get sick of hearing from every bozo on the Internet very quickly. Instead, we’re going to teach you how to write deeply imperfect profiles. We’re going to teach you how to alienate people! By the time you’ve finished putting the advice on this site into action, your profile will be driving away a sizable fraction of your readers. Rest assured, this is a good thing: the rest will be captivated.

We’ve all felt the urge before: the desire to say everything just right, to hit all of the reader’s psychological buttons, to write a profile that will get any reader to want to meet you … or at the very least to make sure that no one is turned off by your words. By trying so hard not to alienate anyone, you bore everyone. This urge is the source of such criminal cliches as “I work hard and play hard!” and “I like quiet nights at home and also nights on the town!” This sort of generica bores your readers, it bores us, and we know that deep down it bores you.

This urge to please is also the reason why many of us are scared to include quirky, personal, even embarrassing information in our profiles. When we succumb to our fear of driving people away with personal details, we also deny the right people a much-needed glimpse into our soul. Provide this glimpse and you’ll find your connection.

Let’s try something different to the generic approach: let’s have fun with our profile. Let’s show them that we’re not afraid to drive away those people who we were never interested in anyway. By doing so, we greatly increase our chances finding someone amazing. Two simple rules apply:

1) You can never write a profile that everyone will be into.

2) You don’t WANT everyone to be into your profile.

With these in mind, we’ll talk about how to write a profile that will intrigue, allure, and engage exactly those people whose interest you want. Generic is out. Honesty, idiosyncracies, anecdotes, quirky details, and your own goofy sense of humor are in. Not only will this approach attract the very people that you want to attract, it will also demonstrate some very attractive qualities in you; confidence, self-awareness, pickiness, and honesty.

So lets get started, and we’ll do our best to break down the art of writing fresh, funny, honest, and spontaneous(!?) profiles, one step at a time.

[Where to Start]
[What to Say]
[The Tagline]
[Answering the Questions]