Let’s look at Match.com one detail at a time…

It’s huge!

With well over a million active users, Match.com is more than twice as large as the next biggest sites. Critical mass is of users is key in any online endeavour – people want to use the site that everyone else is using. There is often only one winner in this game – Facebook, YouTube, Google, eBay … and Match.com. Match.com is easily the winner for mainstream online daters in the US. Wherever you are in the US, Match.com will have a selection of dating options for you. This is really the secret to Match.com’s success. In most ways it’s a very standard online dating site; it follows the basic formula, and does it well. However it has reached a position of dominance, and so has become the default site for most e-daters. Other US sites can only compete by catering to more specific demographics.

It’s a paid site

The subscription fee is ~$20 per month, as long as you’re willing to commit to at least 3 months. Otherwise it’s ~$40 per month. With the basic package you can send as many messages or winks as you like. Without the basic subscription you can’t even view messages sent to you, let alone respond to them. At the same time, an unpaid profile still appears in searches, but there’s no indication of subscription status. This is a little annoying because it’s impossible to tell whether the person you email is even able to open your message.

The paid nature of the site means that it attracts people who are pretty serious about meeting somebody. This means that you’ll probably find fewer flakes than on a free site like OkCupid or PlentyofFish. Anyone with a membership on Match.com is unlikely to be there “just for a lark”. Match.com users have taken a proactive step towards finding a partner, which may be good or bad, depending on what you’re looking for. If you’d rather come to the dating table with fewer expectations, then some of the Match.com demographic may be too relationship-focused for your tastes. On the other hand, if you’re willing to pay the fee then you’re probably in the same place as the rest of the Match crowd.

There are many options for upgrading your membership. You can pay separately to have your profile highlighted, or to have your profile emailed more often to new members, or to access Match.com from your cell phone (for complete addicts), or even to see when people open your messages (for the neurotic).

Although Match.com is a paid service, it still has ads. It even has annoying pop-ups, although these are related to the site itself.

Detailed profiling

When you fill out your Match.com profile, you are presented with a long series of multiple choice options to describe yourself. These cover everything from appearance to  lifestyle to background and values. And in case you feel that you don’t fit in those little check boxes, never fear – most sections allow you to add your own text to describe what a unique snowflake you really are. You also get to pidgeonhole your ideal date — from your preferred hair color to ethnicity to field of employment. You can also search for people based on this huge range of criteria. So if all you really want is a heavyset, blonde sagitarrius who’s into body piercings and owns gerbils … well, you probably won’t find one, but you sure can search.

The Demographic

As the biggest online dating site in the US, Match.com naturally has a fairly broad user base, covering the full spectrum of age groups, nationalities, and socio-economic levels. It could be said that Match.com users tend towards the mainstream; scan through 50 profiles and you will see a lot of repetition. However there are so many people on Match.com that you’ll eventually find that special spark. As mentioned, its users shell out around $20 a month for the service, so they’re more likely to be looking for relationships.

Functionality

The site is very well established, and everything works… as long as you’ve paid your subscription. If not, the site is designed to be simultaneously tantalizing and annoying, and you’ll find yourself being redirected to the subscription page again and again.

The search function works well, and you can search based on a staggering array of criteria. Privacy options aren’t bad, but could be better – you can block individual users from sending you emails, but not from seeing your profile. The instant messaging system works well, and you can switch it off if you find IMs annoying.

Is it for you?

It’s free to search Match.com, so go browse through some profiles and see what you think. There are so many people on the site that it’s likely you’ll find one or two who take your fancy. However it might take you a while; the search criteria are extensive, but in a way superficial, so you may have to trawl through a lot of profiles before you find someone to connect with. If you have specific tastes, it might be more efficient to find a more specialized site, but if you want the broadest range of options, then Match.com is probably the site for you.

The Lowdown

Pros:

• enormous user base
• broad range of users
• easy to use
• users typically serious about meeting someone

Cons:

• it’ll cost you
• you don’t know whether the person you message can read it or respond
• ads, even though it’s a paid site
• can’t block people from seeing your profile

Here are things you should know about OkCupid…

It’s free

You don’t have to pay, which is good. This also means that the users of OkCupid tend to be a more casual crowd. A lot of them are just there for laughs – to do quizzes or to chat – and don’t want to actually meet up with people. Users of paid sites tend to be more ’serious’ about online dating – after all, they shell out a monthly fee for the privilege – and so may be more likely to meet you. They may also be more likely to want to marry and have kids with you. This could be a good thing or a bad thing, depending on what you’re looking for.

A paid option was recently introduced to OkCupid. This ~$4 monthly investment gives you a few extra options – you can award other users with special badges, you get highlighted in searches, and a couple of other small advantages. It’s a small charge compared to paid sites, but the free version is fully functional without it.

The site is supported by ads instead of subscription revenue, but the ads aren’t too intrusive – no annoying pop-ups for example.

It’s has quizzes and tests!

One of the coolest features of OkCupid is the unique matching system. Answer questions in a never-ending quiz to to determine your compatibility with other users. Each question asks for a multiple choice response, gauging your feelings about a particular issue – social, political, sexual, and more. You are also asked to give your perfect partner’s response – how do you want your dream boy/girl to think? – and also an indication of how important that question is to you. There are many hundreds of questions, and you can answer as many as you like. When you look at another profile, OkCupid compares responses from questions that you both answered, and calculates a % match, a % friend, and a % enemy. You can also click the “compare” button and you will be present with a detail statistical analysis of your relative levels of kinkiness, compassion, coolness, and anything else that the quiz has measured.

The usefulness of the OkCupid matching system depends very much on how honest you are with yourself, and on how well you really know your own preferences in a partner. If the answer to both of those is “reasonably well”, then the system is actually pretty good. You’ll have a hell of a lot more in common with a 90% match than a 60% match, but don’t sweat a difference of only a few percentage points.

This match system is a significant improvement over the usual dating site questionaires that ask you for the most superficial criteria – physical attributes, wealth, education, political affiliation, etc. While these things may be important, OkCupid’s system is much, much better at identifying ‘your peeps’ – folks that you might have a real connection with.

The questionaire is also used to award you with badges that appear below your profile, labelling you as things like “more desiring of love”, “less adventurous”, and “more kinky” than the average user.

And then there are the tests. These are great fun, especially if you don’t mind being pidgeonholed. Answer a series of questions and OkCupid will determine dating persona, whether you are a geek, nerd or dork, and even the accuracy of your gaydar. Some of these tests are designed by OkCupid, but most are submitted by enthusiastic users. There are thousands upon thousands of these tests, and they help to make OkCupid a real community site. On the down side, these tests might be a little TOO fun, because there are lots of people who sign up just to do the tests, and have no desire to meet new people.

One other point in favor of the quiz and tests – they offer a handy excuse if you ever need to lie about why you joined the site. For all you scaredy cats out there.

It’s a community

OkCupid has been very successful in building an online community. The forum is very active, full of online dating anecdotes and ‘expert’ advice. If you ask nicely, you’ll get lots of (usually) useful feedback on your profile and your photos. Each OkCupid profile comes with a blog. For the most part these go unused, but if you see that your subject of interest has some blog entries you should definitely read them for that bit of extra insight. You can even mess with other people’s profiles – in a very limited way; you can suggest edits, and if you have a paid a-list account you can give out special awards.

The official OkCupid blog, OkTrends, is something altogether different. Found at blog.okcupid.com, OkTrends presents some truly fascinating studies of the habits of OkCupid users. Want to know which enthicities or religious groups respond to which? Curious whether starting a message with “hi” or “how’s it going” gets a higher response rate? Ever pondered the effect of including the word “zombie” in your missives? OkTends will tell you.

And last of all, the IM feature. It works, and can be great for having random chats with complete strangers without exchanging any contact information. You can chat with as many people as you like at once. You can also block the use of this feature, or filter which people can contact you. If fact, so many people block its use – perhaps most of the women on the site – that its use has become somewhat limited.

It’s relatively uncensored

Since it’s free, OkCupid doesn’t need to police the content of profiles for illegal contact information. You’ll often see links to peoples’ other sites, YouTube vids, and whatnot in their profiles. You’ll also see more profanity and sexually explicit text than in paid, mainstream sites. Photos with nudity and truly obnoxious profiles (or ads for prostitutes) are flagged by users and usually removed pretty quickly.

It’s big

And OkCupid is getting bigger and bigger. At the time of writing there are typically between 10,000 and 20,000 users logged on at a time. There are over half a million reasonably active users. It’s predominately a US site, but is also somewhat active in the UK and Canada.

The demographic

The demographic is definitely a little younger than mainstream paid sites like match.com and chemistry.com. It’s free and it’s fun, and has developed the reputation of being a little edgier than the other big sites, and so the majority of users are in their 20’s, although there are still plenty of 30- and 40-somethings.

Functionality

The site is fairly mature, and everything works pretty well.

Privacy options are OK – you can block others from turning up in your searches, and you can filter who can and can’t message or IM you based on a range of criteria. One glaring omission is that you can’t block individual people from viewing your profile, which sucks if you find your boss on the site before she finds you…

The search function is decent – you can search based on a range of criteria (including some test results) or keywords within the profile, and you can order the results in many different ways. One slight issue is the navigation to the search page – the “Search” button doesn’t lead to a criteria search. To get this you need to click on “Match”. I’ve had reports of  people being confused by this.

Is it for you?

Well, it’s free, so it’s only a small investment in time to give it a shot. In general, it’s best for a slightly younger (at heart) crowd. If you wouldn’t mind dabbling in online dating, but want a laid-back approach, then OkCupid is a great option. If you want to meet people who aren’t fervently searching for their one-true love, then OkCupid could be for you. If you like doing quizzes and tests, then sign up immediately. However the OkCupid crowd is a little less mainstream, so if that’s not you then you’ll have less luck.

The Lowdown

Pros:

• it’s free
• fun quizzes and tests
• innovative and effective matching system
• active online community aspect
• less ’serious’ users

Cons:

• some users aren’t there to meet people
• some profanity may be found – if that shit bothers you
• no way to block others from seeing your profile
• less ’serious’ users